Wednesday, 26 August 2015

Wedding Series - 'Wait... you're in a Long Distance Relationship??!'

So I thought I'd follow up my proposal story with a post about what it means to be in an LDR. I often get so many questions, and see so many other posts and Buzzfeeds about being in a Long Distance Relationship and half of them really drive me crazy. I thought an honest and uplifting insight should be shared!
We've been together for two years and we're now engaged (eeeeeeeeee I'm SO excited!) you can read how my fiancé proposed here. We first met while I was studying abroad and dated for 10 months before I moved home. Lucky for us we'd settled into our relationship and knew each other really well. Now that I'm back home it means that we have to travel to see each other, sometimes going months apart. It's not impossible though, and there are so many plus sides to this type of relationship. Here are some things I discovered, and my insights into what it's like, for all you other LDR couples out there.

1. Once you're in one, it seems like everybody else is!
I actually know four other couples who are long distance relationships. Living in different time zones kind of long. One couple is actually my best friend and Big! Like me she's engaged, with a beautiful country style wedding planned for next year. It gives you hope and comfort to know this. Being in an LDR isn't out of the ordinary, or impossible, it's perfectly normal and super possible actually. Chin up buttercup!

2.  Being apart is heartbreaking, but when you're together...
You know how exciting the start of a relationship is? You get butterflies and message each other constantly. Talking to them makes your heart beat really fast, and when you see them you can't stop holding hands and smiling. That's what it's like every time I get to see Mr.P. It's true that being away from each is hard, I cry and miss him always, but the time we spend together is worth it.

3. You will go a little crazy.
A message goes unread, or you don't get a reply for hours (even when you take the time difference into account). There's been times where I've gotten incredibly jealous other something that doesn't even exist. It's easy to loose your mind a little, emotions are in over drive and you're bound to have some doubt. This happens in any relationship though. It's natural and normal, you just need to remember to be open and share your low points with your boyfriend or girlfriend. Communication is so important.

4. Money.
It costs a lot. I worked my butt off this past year while finishing University to be able to save enough to fly out and visit Mr.P. But you get to travel! Hello.... extra vacations! It's something you need to understand and be organised about. Look for cheaper travel options, and plan in advance.

5. Everyone and their dog will have an opinion.
They'll always be right, and you'll always be wrong, biased, or odd. I've come across some nasty comments from people when they've found out about my relationship. I've also had wonderfully supportive friends, family and strangers. Just remember that it's nobodies business but you're own, you have nothing to prove, and nothing to defend. Keep a positive mind and it'll all be okay.

20 comments:

  1. I've never been in an LDR but I have a friend who is in a very similar situation to yours. I really respect relationships like this, and I wish you all the best for the future! x

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  2. Aww! This is so sweet! When I met my fella we were in a long distance relationship sort of. About 3 hours away, we worked and had commitments at home. Not much fun when neither of us drove. Luckily the lngest we went without seeing each other was about 3 weeks.

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  3. Thanks for posting this. I'm just at the beginning of a new LDR but I have done it before and for me it just works better. I need a lot of space and I am quite busy at work, so most evenings I want to concentrate on eating healthy and spending time with my girlfriends. Not only do I live in Cologne and he lives in Vienna, but he is a professional poker player and travels around 250 days every year. Yes, the travel is nice though. I am off to Barcelona this weekend to join him there.

    I am glad that I found your job and I am looking forward to read more from you,

    Nadine

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  4. I've never been in a long distance relationship but I can see how actually sometimes a LDR would make a relationship more exciting because you don't see each other as much. It means when you're together you really put the effort in. x

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  5. Aww this is lovely - I'm some something having a LDR can help make things so much stronger. x

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  6. I've never been in a long distance relationship but I can imagine it would make you closer as you have to make the most of the time you have together :) How lovely x

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  7. Oh what a lovely post - You seem so happy and I truly wish you every good wish possible! Kaz x

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  8. My work colleague has been in an LDR for 2 years too. They take it in turns to travel up/down the country every weekend. So sweet!

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  9. Although not the same, I moved away to college after starting a relationship with my now husband. Being 2 hours away was hard enough and I soon moved back home. We've been together for 15 years now. One of my best friends married her online boyfriend from Texas. It happens a lot more than people think. Congratulations x

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  10. I was in an LDR until very recently, now I live with my partner. Its hard but it pays off as it seems to have done for you. congratulations and good luck for the future and all that jazz.

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  11. I was long distance with my boyfriend until a year and a half ago. We moved in together and then there was a lot of adjusting to do haha!

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  12. I was in an LDR with my now hubby and the distance was so hard at times, but totally worth it in the end x

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  13. I was in an LDR with my now hubby and the distance was so hard at times, but totally worth it in the end x

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  14. I had to do a LDR when hubby and I moved away to start with. I moved up to Luton to get a home secured whilst his transfer papers went through, he went off to Ireland to wait. It was hard and I found the insecurities the hardest, I got jealous over anything. Thankfully it was only a few months and it was hell for me as a person. I'm just to insecure for a LDR. Congratulations on your engagement.

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  15. That is the cutest photo ever! I know one couple who were in a LDR after meeting on holiday. They have been married for 5 years now and have a child :)

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  16. My relationship with my husband started off as a long distance relationship - him living in Denmark and me living in the UK - It was a difficult time and like you say everyone and their dog has an opinion! I think if it's the right person you make it work, and now my husband and I live together - it was worth it =)

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  17. I don't think that I could be in a long distance relationship, I would miss my partner too much. You're a gorgeous couple btw, congrats!

    Daniella | Freshly Pressed Beauty

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  18. That is such a lovely picture of you and your fiancé.

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  19. I dont think i would be able to do that. I am such a ontrol freak that the guy would have ''swearing word consored'' hahaha

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  20. I was in a long distance relationship once and it did indeed drive me a bit mad. I'm glad it's going so great for you. Ps cute picture!

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Thank you for your lovely comment :)